


He’s Gone

by Sohotthateveryonedied



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Gen, broganes, keith is bad at coping, takes place right after the last scene of season 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-05-06 22:55:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14657931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sohotthateveryonedied/pseuds/Sohotthateveryonedied
Summary: My take on what happened at the end of season two when Shiro disappeared, and how Keith reacted to the sudden loss. There is angst, loss, and emotional breakdowns galore in this fic, so enjoy.





	He’s Gone

"He's gone." 

From the moment those words left Lance's mouth, Keith had gone completely numb. A cold feeling washed over him, freezing the blood in his veins and bringing every function in his body to a complete halt. Just like that, he shut down. It was as though his mind had disconnected from his body permanently and was now floating around in space along with all the debris from the fight. 

_He's gone._

_He's gone._

_He's gone._

They repeated in Keith's head again and again, like some terrible mantra he couldn’t silence. 

He stared with wide eyes for what felt like hours at the empty pilot's seat, expecting Shiro to suddenly reappear, perfectly fine and ready to celebrate their victory. 

But he didn't. He never would. 

How could everything have gone so wrong so fast? 

The rest of the team was in a similar state of shock. Keith could see them out of the corner of his eye, asking themselves and each other exactly _where_ Shiro could have possibly gone, but Keith couldn't hear anything over his own heartbeat. All he could do was stare blankly at the empty chair where his leader, his friend, his _brother_ had sat not ten minutes ago. 

Pidge's voice was quiet behind him, thick with unshed tears. "What... What happened to him?" she asked no one in particular. 

Nobody offered up any answers. It was like Shiro had simply disappeared from existence, evaporated into thin air. Gone, without a single trace. 

All that was left behind was his bayard which stuck up in the dashboard, like it was expecting its paladin to come back and claim it any minute. But that was all. Black wasn't even _on_ anymore. The lion had lost all signs of life the second Shiro was no longer there. Keith could feel it—the cold empty air that started to feel like a ghost town. Or a graveyard. 

_He's gone._

A tentative hand touched his arm, snapping him out of his paralysis. With a shudder he turned, eyes glazed over and breath shaky. Lance was at his side, eyeing him with concern. How long had he been there? 

"Hey, are you okay, man?" He sounded like he had a lump in his throat. 

"H-he's gone," Keith heard slipping from his own mouth, but it didn't sound like him. When he usually talked, he didn't sound like he was dying inside. He didn't sound like a boy who had just lost the last of his family. 

He looked back at the pilot’s seat where Shiro was supposed to be. “He's gone," he repeated, trying to make sense of the words. He was a broken record. It felt like his heart had shattered and now he didn't know what to do with the leftover pieces scattered in his chest cavity. 

Keith must have looked on the brink of a breakdown, because Lance and the others exchanged nervous glances. Hunk took a timid step closer to Keith, maybe to comfort him, but Keith backed away until his back hit the wall of the cockpit. Suddenly he couldn't breathe. There were too many people around him. The thick air and the weight of grief squeezed his lungs like a vice. 

_He'd just gotten him back._

_He'd just gotten him back and now he was alone all over again._

Keith had to get out of there. 

Ignoring the calls to stop and his teammates reaching out to him, Keith turned on his heel and ran without a second's thought. He jumped out of the cockpit and landed, not even noticing the sharp pain up his legs upon impact. The moment his feet hit the floor, he took off as fast as his legs could carry him. Out of the hangar, through the castle, he didn't even care where he was going. All he knew was that he had to run as far away from this place as he could get. It was all he knew how to do now. 

He kept running, pushing himself faster and faster so none of his problems could catch up to him. Rationality would have told him that was a stupid move, trying to run away from his problems, but rationality had long since left. Rationality was little more than a ghost in his mind. Now all he could do was cope in the only way he knew how—the only way he’d ever learned how to. 

He'd run when his dad left, he'd run when Shiro had been presumed dead and Keith had nothing left but a dagger and a mind full of questions, and now he found himself running yet again, because the one person he cared about most in the universe had left him behind all over again. Because Shiro was gone and he couldn't handle facing this reality—not again. 

Keith had no idea how long he'd been running, and he didn't care. Not about the burning in his muscles, not about the tightness in his chest, not even about the fact that he had nowhere to go. 

And when he finally did stop, it was only because he was so lightheaded he was afraid he'd collapse if he tried to go any farther. It was in one of the dozens of identical white hallways in the castle where Keith stopped to catch his breath. 

He was trembling. 

He tried to calm himself, knew that the tightness in his chest was a sign of a panic attack, but he couldn't even think. Everything was turning around in his head so fast he couldn't focus on anything but those same two words, over and over again until they had no meaning anymore. 

_He's gone._

It wasn't fair. This wasn't supposed to happen. It was bad enough the first time, but going through this again? Losing the closest thing he'd ever had to family for the second time? How was he supposed to move on from that? 

Keith's hands balled into fists, nails digging deep into his palms. They might have drawn blood, but even if they did, he couldn't feel it. He couldn’t feel anything. 

God, what was he supposed to do now? 

_He’s gone._

_He’s gone._

_You’re alone again._

Keith picked his head up, wiping tears he hadn’t realized had fallen. Somewhere along the way, sadness made way for anger that tasted like hot metal on his tongue. He needed to hit something. He needed to feel anything, anything to remind him he was still alive, still intact. 

Crying out with rage and grief, he slammed his fist against the wall once, twice. It ached, but it was little more than an echo in the back of his mind, beyond the wall of numbness. He punched again, and before he knew it he was hitting and pounding the wall until his knuckles split and his hands slid against the blood. But he didn't stop. He didn't know what else to do. There was no one to take out his anger on for taking Shiro away from him. They'd already defeated Zarkon, so there was no one left to get revenge on for Shiro's disappearance. 

But Keith needed someone to be angry at. Anger was all he had; it was the only thing he’d relied on to keep him going. Anger at his mother for abandoning him like he was worthless, like he didn't matter enough to stick around for. Anger at his dad for abandoning him as well, as though he hadn't already suffered enough. Anger at the Garrison for keeping the secrets of Shiro's first disappearance away from him, and for sending him on that stupid mission in the first place. 

But now? 

Now, Keith had no anger to rely on to keep him going. 

No anger, no one to blame, and no Shiro. 

Slamming his fists against the wall one last time, all the fight went out of him. Keith squeezed his eyes shut and wrapped his arms around himself, trying to hold his broken pieces together. His breaths came out as choked sobs, and it wasn't long before his legs gave out beneath him. He slid down the wall and pulled his legs to his chest, hugging them close as he sobbed into his knees. 

_He's gone._

_I'm alone again._

_He's gone._


End file.
